


Melancholic Keeper

by ArtofNen



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Canon Compliant, Canonical Character Death, Gen, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Shingeki no Kyojin Chapter 132: Wings of Freedom Spoilers, Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan Manga Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-22
Updated: 2021-01-22
Packaged: 2021-03-13 22:20:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 681
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28910733
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArtofNen/pseuds/ArtofNen
Summary: An ode to Levi, his familiarity with death, and a farewell.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 6





	Melancholic Keeper

**Author's Note:**

> hi there! so after completely bawling my eyes out after reading chapter 132, i decided to give myself a little therapy by writing this. am i still in an absurd amount of agony and heartbreak? yes, but this helped me, and hopefully it will help you too! (or maybe give you more pain who knows)
> 
> Levi means a lot to me, so i hope i did him well with this.

Levi knows death. He knows it not as a friend, but as something that enables him to live in the cruel reality that he does. His life is not grim because of death, his life _exists_ because of it, and he supposes that’s not something he can complain about. 

Levi knows death. It’s why he was able to let Erwin breathe his last instead of choosing for him to live through a hell they both knew well once again. It’s why he doesn’t let the decision haunt every waking moment of his anymore.

Levi knows death. He can recognize the exact moment a person has made the selfless decision to sacrifice their life for others. It’s why he was able to touch his fist to Hange’s chest as he uttered his final words to his friend—“Dedicate your heart.” 

__________

Levi knows death. It’s why he knows it has finally caught up to him too. Not that he’d been running away from it. He can’t lie, at first it was immediate relief. It felt incredible to finally let go of the burdens he’s been so tirelessly harboring. The familiarity of death felt ultimately comforting when it finally reached him. 

The ache of countless wounds, the misery of existence, it was all over. At last, Levi could rest, so why did he feel so strange? 

“Did you miss us that much?” He whips his head back at the sound of a voice he thought he let go of long ago. The constant frown Levi’s had on his face quickly falls in shock at the sight of his lost comrades walking towards him, “Hange? Erwin?” 

He supposes it makes sense that he could finally see them now that he, too, has died, but something in Levi makes him feel unprepared, as if he shouldn’t be seeing them so soon. 

Erwin greets him with a small smile, “We didn’t expect to see you here already, Levi.” 

“I don’t even know where I am,” Levi admits with a heavy frown, gaze meeting blue eyes he hasn’t seen in years. 

Hange laughs loudly, “Well something, or someone, finally got their hands on you since you’re here now.”

Rolling his eyes, Levi glowers at his friend, “As if I’d let that happen so easily.” 

The air around them seems to still as a few beats of silence pass.

“So then, why are you here?” Erwin asks in such a simple manner that it stops whatever snide remark Levi felt forming in response. 

_Why am I here? Why does this feel so wrong?_ He doesn’t let himself panic, but a wave of anxiety attempts to reach him. 

“Levi,” Hange addresses him with a sudden serious tone, “Do you want to be here?”

He’s surprised at the question, and his first inclination is to say yes. He’s finally reuniting with the two people he cared for the most in his bitter life. No more sleepless nights, no more haunting hours—he could leave it all behind at last. However, the nagging feeling comes back, stopping him from saying what initially crossed his mind. 

_It’s too soon_ , he thinks with finality, and as if having read his mind, Erwin nods, “We think so as well.” 

Levi pauses for a moment, wondering for a second time if the decision he’s about to make is the right one. Is he really about to walk back into the horrid reality that he was just able to escape? Is he really willing to depart from his comrades a second time?

Hange stops his train of thought, grinning, “Don’t go all soft on us now, Levi.”

Ignoring the tease, Levi glances up at his companions, allowing himself one more glimpse at Hange’s bright face and Erwin’s composed demeanor. They look back at him with knowing smiles and a deep gaze, and Levi knows it’s time for him to leave.

He nods and turns around. Walking away, he raises his hand with a final farewell, “Until next time.”

__________

Levi knows death. It’s why he knew he wasn’t ready for it to know him just yet.

**Author's Note:**

> isayama i'm begging you to give Levi some much needed therapy. my guy is not having a grand time right now 


End file.
